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 ► / Wednesday, September 17, 2008 @ 10:12 PM
} Confession,

I'm not okay.

If I was okay, I'd be always very happy. People seem to take me for granted because they know I'm always happy. So who cares if I have feelings huh ?
If I was okay, I wont cry.
If I was okay, I would not walk as if I possess no purpose in life.
If I was okay, I'd still have my umpteenth self-esteem.
If I was okay, you'd see me all crazy and running around like a little kid.
If I was okay, I'd laugh or smile like there's no tomorrow.
If I was okay, you wouldnt see me often down and nonchalant.
If I was okay, I wouldnt always get tired of being in pain and sleeping early. (I know, this is quite stupid)
If I was okay, it'd be because of my phone; smses from you.

You're frustrated because I kept getting upset over the same thing over and over again, I know that now, but is it wrong for me to feel as if I'm actually losing you ? Because, I've went through this before and,

.
.
.

And I'm afraid it might happen to me, once again. Please dont leave me and I apologise if I'm doubting your love or loyalty now by saying such things.

I've been crying, in class, in the bus, at home. Basically everywhere ? But I'm faking a smile, so as not to be selfish to the people who really care about me.

I am sorry.

And I'm walking away, from all the troubles in my life

for now ... [:

That is all.